Funny Quotes

Looks ugly. Tastes great.

I can’t believe I ate the whole thing! – Alka Seltzer

Birthdays are good for your health. People who have more birthdays, live longer.

Our aim is to keep the toilets clean – your aim will help!

Practice safe lunch use condiments.

I’m not lazy, I’m energy efficient.

The easiest way to get a healthy body is to marry one.

If you want to get ahead, get a hat.

Please don’t interrupt me while Im ignoring you.

If cheerleading is so easy, why can’t you pick up any girls?

I mustache you to vote for me!

Wake the hell up!

We didn’t lose the game; we just ran out of time.

Stay safe or die trying.

When nothing goes right, Go left.

C.L.A.S.S. – Come Late and Start Sleeping

A prune a day, keeps poop flowing the right way!

I go bananas for fruits.

Keep the Earth clean, it’s not Uranus.

Safety is great unless you’re late.

The best of exercise is to use your arms to push yourself away from the table.